The Best Dad Jokes of All Time
5 min read
This Father’s Day we’re celebrating dads in a big way to thank them for
all they do for us. This includes treating them to breakfast in bed, doing dad activities together and sending them the perfect Father's Day gift or Father's Day Hamper.
But what better way to celebrate dads than with a dad joke or two (or
25)? Known for their shocking puns and one-liners that make you groan, dads are the best at dishing out oddly comforting wisecracks. We’ve rounded up our favourite flower themed dad jokes – is your dad
guilty of cracking any of these pearlers?
Which flowers kiss best?
Which beer do florists like most?
What plant do you give Dad for his jokes?
A face palm
What is a florist's favourite movie?
Back to the Fuchsia
What is a florist's favourite romcom line?
You had me at Aloe
If you’re looking for some Dad puns to put in your gift tag, we have
some inspiration for you.
“Dad - You're my best BUD”
“Dad - I'm proud to be y’ORCHID”
“Dad - For Father's Day, we ROSE to the occasion”
“Dad - Thanks for all the SAGE advice over the years”
“Dad - It's party THYME”
“Dad - Hope THISTLE make your day”
Dad, did you get a haircut?
No, I got them all cut.
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?
Great food, no atmosphere.
Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers?
They say he made a mint.
I went to buy some camouflage pants the other day.
Couldn’t find any.
Did you hear about the guy who stole a calendar?
He got 12 months.
What did the ocean say to the shore?
Nothing, it just waved.
How do locomotives know where they are going?
Lots of training.
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
How much does a hipster weigh?
What are the advantages of living in Switzerland?
Well, the flag is a big plus.
Did you hear there’s a new type of broom out?
It’s sweeping the nation.
I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey.
But I turned myself around.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
What do you call Jay Z when he’s sleeping?
Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water?
If they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.
What’s Forrest Gump’s password?
I’d tell you a joke about construction but I’m still working on it.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
I thought about going on an all-almond diet.
But that’s just nuts.
What did the grape do when he got stepped on?
He let out a little wine.
I wouldn’t buy anything with Velcro.
It’s a total rip-off.
Two guys walk into a bar.
The third guy ducks.
Hi hungry, I’m Dad.
What is your favourite dad joke?
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